19 October 2007

Paths to Adventure - Frontierland

Adventureland was just the beginning. As you stepped through the arch, leaving the pirates and jungles behind you, you entered the dusty realm of bandits, cowboys, and wilderness. Saddle up partners, we’ve entered Frontierland. Where the dirt roads are lined with opportunity and the sounds of the fiddle, guitar, and harmonica keep your feet tappin’ all the live long day.

As you make your way into the west, your first encounter will undoubtedly be with the Frontierland Fries. Travelers, passersby, and settlers alike have been known to frequent the covered wagon, seeking Cookie McDonald’s fine fried potatoes. Should you tummy be grumbling, there are more tasty places to rustle up some grub, but this should tied you over if you need it.

Venturing around the bend, you will find yourself face to face with the two tallest peaks of Frontierland. Chickapin Hill and Big Thunder Mountain tower over the land, and can be seen from all over. Passing between the two mountains is the world famous Walt Disney World Railroad. Once you’ve heard its whistle, and been carried upon its rails, you’ll never forget it. Should you find yourself on board, your stops will include Mickey’s Toontown Fair and Main Street U.S.A. with, of course, return passage to Frontierland. Along the way you will pass straight through an Algonquin camp.

The peak of Big Thunder Mountain has its own railroad that beacons adventurous cowpokes. Big Thunder Mountain Railroad runs along the tracks set down by the miners of Tumbleweed, the nearby town. The miners vanished years ago, after refusing to listen to warnings about digging for gold on ancient Indian burial grounds. The curse of Big Thunder caused an earthquake, which destroyed everything in its path. The train roars through the abandoned mines and the now flooded town of tumbleweed before taking sharp turns through dinosaur fossils and geysers. Heed the advice of the Indians, and leave their sacred burial grounds untouched. With engine names like I.B. Hearty, I.M. Brave, I.M. Fearless., U.B. Bold, U.R. Courageous, and U.R. Daring, one should always have their wits about them on this journey.

One peak over, Chickapin Hill is overrun with logs racing down its falls. Should you be so inclined to board one of these logs, you may find yourself in an awful mess. It seems that Chickapin Hill, sometimes called Splash Mountain, is home to the rowdy bunch of Br’er Rabbit, Br’er Fox, and Br’er Bear. Br’er Rabbit makes his way through the hills and woods surrounding his home in search of his Laughin’ Place, while Br’er Fox and Br’er Bear are in search of a way to catch and cook Br’er Rabbit. Watch the path your log flows through, if you find yourself climbing to the top of Chickapin Hill, watch out and hold on! That hill has been known throw plenty of logs straight into the briar patch below, drenching all the occupants of the log. I wouldn’t worry too much about Br’er Rabbit though, he’s a crafty rabbit to be sure.

Across the way, along the banks of the Rivers of America, sit rafts destined for Tom Sawyer’s Island. On the island you’ll find treats at Aunt Polly’s, caves and tunnels surrounding the Magnetic Mystery Mine and Injun Joe’s Cave, along with Fort Langhorn across the barrel bridge, complete with escape tunnel, should the need arise for a full retreat. In the old Harper’s Mill, be sure to watch for blue birds. They like to make their nest in the gears and cogs while singing their famous tune. As well, be on the look out for paint brushes. Tom and Huck hid their brushes to escape their chores and set out on their own boyhood adventures. Folks say finding these brushes will help you beat the other adventurers to the logs of Splash Mountain or the trains of Big Thunder Mountain Railroad, or so the story goes.

After taking a raft back across to the mainland, take a stroll down Frontierland’s main thoroughfare. If you find your stomach growling after your rip-roarin’ travels through the peaks of Frontierland this trail offers an assortment of chow. Westward Ho offers up some tasty snacks. It once used to be a main staple shop along Frontierland, but has since been reduced to a single wagon selling bites to eat. Throughout the rest of Frontierland you may find vendors with turkey legs, fresh popped corn, and ice cream, but eat quickly, that blazing western sun is sure to melt your frozen treat in a hurry. Should need a more manly meal, stop in at Pecos Bill’s Tall Tale Inn & CafĂ©. Here, not only will you find a meal for any appetite, but you can also inspect the cabinets full of memorabilia loaned to Pecos Bill by some of his heroic friends.

Down the way you can stop in and take a load off at Grizzly Hall. Here Henry leads a paw thumpin’ how down with some of the most talented bears this side of the Mississippi. They ask for no hibernatin’, but with the likes of Big Al, the Sun Bonnet Trio, Gomer, Liver Lips McGrowl, Trixie, and the Five Bear Rugs (Zeke, Zeb, Ted, Fred, Tennessee, and their little friend Baby Oscar) you know you couldn’t catch even a single wink.

Supply depots can be found all along the route. Big Al’s, Frontierland Trading Post, and Prairie Outpost and Supply should be able to assist you in stocking up on whatever it is your pack is lacking. And if you think your aim is getting a bit rusty, be sure to stop in at the Shootin’ Arcade. This “ghost town” is the ideal place to perfect your dead-eye aim.

As you come to the mighty Mississippi draining into the Rivers of America you realize that you are leaving the frontier for the more civilized realm of Liberty Square. Be sure to take note of the west’s last outpost. The militia here never abandons one of its own and, as a full fledged citizen of Frontierland now, the west will always have your back.

1 comment:

theDisnerd said...

This series is my favorite so far!! Seriously, so well written!